Name: Hayden Scott Nicknames: Scotty, Spoof, Haydee. Marital status: Married Spouse: Portia DeRossi Likes: alcohol fueled violence, cronulla beach riots. Dislikes: ethnics, enclosed shoes, repercussions of excessive dare iced coffees, pronouncing words with multiple syllables. Bio: Don’t let this boys feminine physique mislead you, Scott has become an integral part of this SNESA league side …
Name: Christian Tufilli Aliases: Scudz, Carrado, Silly Ding, Gino Likes: Pasta, Gel, Fully Sick Subwoofers and TAB Dislikes: Losing AFL multi’s by a kick Bio: Scudz transferred from soccer to come and try his hand at real football. After the coach “whitey” at the time could see he could nearly kick and handball, he was …
Name: Chris Millsteed Aliases: Milky, Milly, Milkstain, Milkdud Likes: Bully, trainers, getting caught holding the ball, having X-Rays and applying sunscreen before games. Bio: Chris is heavily involved in the football club and recently he created the 90’s party as an excuse to sport a shit haircut and raid his mum’s lingerie drawer. Surprisingly however, …
Name: Ben Magry Aliases: Mags, Magavry, Maggy, Goo, Maggy-goo-goo, Beno, Noey, Noah, Bert Magry Born: India Age: 21 Occupation: Chippy mate Enjoys: Working Bio: Born with a hammer in hand inside a port-a-loo outside a job site in Mumbai – Benjamin Magry moved to Perth in 1994 to follow his dream of AFL and to …
Name: Hayden Burgs Burgoyne Height: 185cm (188cm after kicking a goal) Likes: Dominoes cheap Tuesday’s. Booty shaking on the D-Floor, Communal Wedges, Massaging large deltoids. Dislikes: Long canteen lines. Conscious girls. Bio: After kicking over 100 goals in the colts last year, the {rokbox title=|Jack Vidgen :: Burgoyne’s Hair| text=|Jack Vidgen|}http://resources3.news.com.au/images/2011/05/05/1226050/338055-jack-vidgen.jpg{/rokbox} hair-styled Burgoyne has struggled …
Name: Justin Baptist Blappy Age: 24 Hometown: Denpasar Likes: Brunner’s Ex-girlfriends, Smokin’ darts Bio: Justin Blaptist is an extremely crafty footballer. We’ve all seen him play. Some might even say he was the first Cyril Rioli. Week in week out he gets the job done. His silky smooth ball work and his precise pidgeon kicks …
Name: Suman Das Aliases: The Black Blur, Dassy Rascal, D-A-Dollar Sign, Sniper, Bollywood Bad-Boy Age: 27 Fav foods: white rice Favourite Music: Gladys Knight and the Pips, Rick James, Wu-Tang Clan Enjoys: Grill workouts including sit-ups and leg raises, Picking up honey’s at the E-V-E, Blazing up, Sweet Bean Bio: Suman came down to SNESA …
Name: Terry Wog Dog Wallace Age: 23 Hometown: Mafia money laundering factory at an undisclosed location (presumed to be in the hills of Sicily) Likes: Cup-caking pommy girlfriend, losing golf balls in bushes on-course Foods: Massive bowls of pasta with a whole loaf of garlic bread on the side finished off with half a tub …
Name: Brendan Colkers Lizard Age: 24 Origin: “I was born in a seaplane somewhere over Eurasia” Fav foods: Fried chicken, grape soda, watermelon Enjoys: Tim-o-matic, Dancing with his eyes closed, hot family BBQ’s Bio: When Brendan has free time between hot family commitments he tries to fit in a game of footy. He is best …
Name: Ryan Edmunds Elmo Age: 25 Games: 97 Origin: Croatian Jew Enjoys: Lighting flares, molotovs Bio: Elmo has made the ultimate sacrifice for the football club – he is now unable to cognitively function above a year 4 level, and wears a helmet to reduce the risk of further damage. Often seen trying to put …