Name: Hayden Scott
Nicknames: Scotty, Spoof, Haydee.
Marital status: Married
Spouse: Portia DeRossi
Likes: alcohol fueled violence, cronulla beach riots.
Dislikes: ethnics, enclosed shoes, repercussions of excessive dare iced coffees, pronouncing words with multiple syllables.
Bio: Don’t let this boys feminine physique mislead you, Scott has become an integral part of this SNESA league side through his ability to break the lines, run and carry on his preferred position the wing.
Although capable of these things, he rarely displays them, resulting in his usual absence from the field.
Scott’s football I.Q. has reached Einstein levels through his uncanny use of the bench as a tool to learn for the majority of games. This allows him to observe from a distance and take in the nuances of the great game. Sadly, his intellectual ability is that of an infant, and Hayden spends most of the game pondering life’s big questions, like “why is it called a building? It looks finished, it should be called a built.”
After contemplating a move to professional inebriated fighting after several successful bouts against siblings, team mates and juveniles, Scott has rededicated himself to football and has shown marked improvement in recent weeks.